when you are not the nurse, do you get involved?

[achot]

Hi, ethical dilemma with halachic ramifications... or the opposite...
My 17 yr old dtr tells me that her friend (also 17) hasn't started menstruating yet and her doctor told her that it is because she is overweight (she is a size 4) and the excess weight of her stomach is pressing on her organs preventing a period.
She claims she is seeing a dietitian to help her in this endeavor.

While I am not diagnosing anorexia, it might be the beginning of something and could be helped with a counselor or therapist or psychologist.

I asked an OB/GYN who says I must approach the parents, but I am reluctant to be the bearer of this. Since it is summer, it wont help to approach her school anonymously as I might do during the school year.

Do I say anything? How? Or do I just watch this how it plays out and if it gets worse say something?
Anyone with experience here?

[medic09]

Rambam learns the duty to heal from the mitzva to restore a lost object. If the analogy holds, then anyone who can restore someone's health may have a duty to do so.

The mitzva to 'love your fellow' requires us to provide a kindness such as we understand to be needed or we would want. Wouldn't you want someone to provide good advice?

Mind you, the girl might be embarrassed that you know about her lack of menses; but that requires tact, not inaction. You might be doing her the greatest hesed by helping ensure that she gets good advice and good care. Were it my daughter, I would want you to speak up just once and offer your insight and advice to specifically see a GYN about this.

Refuah sh'laimah...

[Rivka P]

From what I have heard about in my experience, usually a period is late because a girl is too thin, not if she is heavy. In fact, sometimes if a girl is overweight, she can begin to menstruate early.

You can reccomend she see a different doctor. It's always good to get a second opinion.